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South Indian Wedding Traditions
Southern India is pretty much different from northern part of India in many
cultural senses but for the only common thread that is Hinduism. The prehistoric
Dravidian faiths and style of living come to the fore especially in wedding
rituals with minor differences within the South Indian context.
South Indian weddings are set forth by ‘Nischitartha’ which can be equated with
the wedding engagement. However, the protocols of nischitartha differ hugely
from wedding engagements in two ways.
It seals the wedding by the exchange of ‘Taamboola’, carrying auspicious things
such as jaggery, rice, betel leaves, nuts apart from fruits and flowers on
silver/copper platters between the parties. This signifies the commitment of
parties not to walk out of the engagement.
Groom is not supposed to attend Nischitartha as the belief goes that weddings
signify the coming together of two families for furthering their generation and
familial interests.
Groom’s parents present the bride-to-be with jewelry and saris and she is
perceived as the ‘Lady Luck’ by them. Nischitarthas are almost always held at
brides’ homes and in the presence of a priest.
The real ceremonial buildup to the wedding begins on the previous day when a
series of rituals is performed by the parties at their respective homes. The
first of them is ‘Chappara Puja’ when the decorated entrances to homes are
worshipped wishing everything henceforth a good going till the end of wedding.
Immediately following that, five elderly married women are honored by washing
their feet and presenting them with ‘Baginas’, symbolic sets of adornments for
married women, to seek blessings for the new couple.
Wedding party is hosted by the bride’s parents and they receive the ‘Dibbana’,
groom’s entourage, with what is known as ‘Vara Puja’, an honor to the groom.
This ritual is interesting as it begins with the mock assumption that the groom
is adamant not to wed at this time and he is intercepted by bride’s uncle, just
as he begins to walk off from the venue, to convince about the importance of
starting a new life in wedlock than procrastinating as a single. He is brought
back to the Mantap/podium after pleasing him by promises of support to his later
life and profession. This may appear funny in the present context but it reminds
of the instabilities the youngsters of yesteryears faced. Bride is literally
carried to the Mantap piggyback by her uncle.
The actual wedding involves Kanyadaan (handing over of the bride) by her
parents, Sapta padi, a walk around the holy fire to symbolize the oath taken by
the young couple to stay together in every step of life. They walk with hand in
hand and the ends of their clothes tied together.
Much of the traditions only differ in their celebrations although a Hindu
wedding remains the same at the core.
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